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Captive Heart

Stabbed heart, one that couldn’t feel again.
Tried to be mute through it all.
You’d hardly hear me screaming.
As I kept silent,
I felt my wounds binding themselves up.
But I groaned in pain whenever things reminded me of what hurt my already hurting heart and the things that caused us to separate.
But as my therapy, there came along what felt like an attack
My heart began beating too fast, sending warning signals to my brain,
Burning and igniting every dark sky around me,
Crying acid rain,
There he was.
Someone I don’t know
Beautiful, though. Causing so much chaos.

“And every time I tried to be myself, it comes out wrong like a cry for help”

I longed for a place to belong– but he? He captured my heart.
His face drenched me of all weariness and I realized
With this world being so ugly,
There’s just one thing beautiful in this world. Him.
This wasn’t the first time my eyes looked upon him
But I could feel, for the first time, our hearts beating at the same pace
Our blood is of the same kind.
Cold. Savage. But still, warm; peaceful

Blood is binding
I tried forgetting I could feel, I looked for flaws but
Love is blinding.
But having feelings remains consequential.
I tried to tell my self that I still hated guys. But still, I tried to remember I needed to forgive.
Forgiveness is essential.
No rewinding things that are already over.
The past is present till we’re ready to move forward.
Though seeking precedes finding, I don’t remember looking for him.
He more or less just appeared.
In my black and white world, he’s the only thing that’s grey.
He’s the sun and I’m a little piece of space just happy to be near him.
Light revives.
Healing for this broken soul.
We’ll stay out late and let the music tell our fate.
For me, this is heaven and love is deadly.
But we may age if we do not die today.
So let’s kill the clock inside our heads.
Embracing the stars, the clouds and space meet as one
Singing songs unknown to the human race
They sparkle with brightly lit glitters
They never expected they’d look so beautiful together, did they?
Whatever life has to offer, we’ll stand and face it with open hands and tears
Speaking words way beyond our years
In this tired body, spirit perseveres.

But I can’t conclude with this. I don’t know if he feels like this.
So I keep telling myself “Babe, don’t break your own heart”

For you, I will stab my own heart and drink my own blood. Just please secure this heart you have held captive.

Yours Severely,
Ire

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